THE BIG MOVE!

Today is the day!
Back to the Good ole East we go.
Nageela here we come!

Thoughts of the Jewish Buddhist

• Drink tea and nourish life. With the first sip, joy. With the second sip, satisfaction. With the third sip, peace. With the fourth, a Danish.


• Wherever you go, there you are. Your luggage is another story.


• Accept misfortune as a blessing. Do not wish for perfect health, or a lifewithout problems. What would you talk about?


• The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single Oy.


• The Tao does not speak. The Tao does not blame. The Tao does not take sides.The Tao has no expectations. The Tao demands nothing of others. The Tao is not Jewish.

Happy Hanukah!

With The Jewish holiday of Chanukah fast approaching (less than 6 months away!), I thought you might enjoy this film of the WORLD DREIDEL TOUR (I think I've been in Vegas WAY too long)

http://www.aish.com/jewlariousMultiMedia/jewlariousMultiMediaDefault/World_Dreidel_Tour.asp

Amazing Juggling Video

This is the guy giving the juggling workshop in camp (yeah right).

And if you think that's something, check this out!

K-K-K-K-O-O-O-R-R-R-N-N-N

After waking up from surgery, a still Bill summoned a nurse.
"How do you feel?" She asked.
"Lousy. I want to register a complaint. During the surgery I heard the surgeon say a four letter word. It disturbed me greatly."
"I'm so sorry sir. What was the four letter word?"
"OOPS."

Moving!

Was anyone wondering why I haven't been posting lately? Yes, all you millions of people who check this block religiously every 15 minutes...

Did you guess, that it's because I no longer care about you? No comment Dorky.

In reality, it's moving time!

The sunny Nevada summer days are filled with cardboard boxes and bubble wrap, as the date approaches for our big move back East. Yup, next week the Las Vegas locker family will be descending on the east coast in preparation for camp Nageela.

Can't wait to be back! (Oh, did I mention it's 110 degrees here?)

The Episode of Quail...

A few weeks ago, we read in the Torah about the Jews getting quail to eat in the dessert.
That reminded me of our former vice president (and great potatoe speller) Dan Quayle (under bresident George Bush Sr.), and some of the brilliant things he's said. Enjoy!

I am not part of the problem. I am a Republican.

I have made good judgements in the Past. I have made good judgements in the Future.

People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and have a tremendous impact on history.

Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child.

The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that Dan Quayle may or may not make.


The future will be better tomorrow.

We don't want to go back to tomorrow, we want to go forward.

We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a *part* of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are a *part* of Europe.

We're all capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on the mistakes we may or may not have made.

Welcome to President Bush, Mrs. Bush, and my fellow astronauts.

What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is.

When I have been asked during these last weeks who caused the riots and the killing in L.A., my answer has been direct and simple: Who is to blame for the riots? The rioters are to blame. Who is to blame for the killings? The killers are to blame.

[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system.

Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things.

One word sums up probably the responsibility of any vice president, and that one word is 'to be prepared'.

I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change.

Mars is essentially in the same orbit... Mars is somewhat the same distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe.

The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century.

Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children.

We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world.

We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur.

For NASA, space is still a high priority.

Public speaking is very easy.

I stand by all the misstatements that I've made.

not so deep thoughts

It is fruitless to attempt to indoctrinate a superannuated canine with innovative maneuvers.

Make your own Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, etc.

Maybe it's because I'm always looking to make Camp Nageela more exciting for the campers...

Maybe it's because I'm always looking to make Camp Nageela harder on the counselors...

Or maybe it's because I'm just plain lazy...

I'm lookin for ideas for new, fun, quality activities

Nageela has always had fun specialties, like super splash down, jousting, woodworking and sideline shoot; as well as awesome night activities like Nageela Idol, machachinski and capture the counselor.

Now it's your turn to come up with something new.

Maybe you think it'll be fun to saw your counselors in half (or if it's mogo, in 3 or 4 pieces), or maybe you'd like to have a race rolling down the big hill in a barrel (kids, don't try this at home). Whatever it is, either stick it in a comment, or email the idea to dani@jepli.org and I'll post it for you.

If you come up with something that our panel of expert judges (me and Tova) thinks is good, you'll be playing it this summer!

Nageela Expansion

Yes! Nageela is expanding, in many ways.
Chef Amram and Mordechai Shenker make sure we expand in one way...
Yehuda makes us expand in another way (swollen limbs, casts)
Shaul makes us expand our lungs to hold our breath under water.

In truth, Nageela has grown so much that CAMP NAGEELA FOR BOYS HAS MORE CAMPERS THAN EVER! Unfortunately, we've been turning down potential campers because we're so full.
I hope you're signed up.

In order to accommodate our new numbers, we've developed a camper compacting machine, where we can stuff 22 campers into one bunk bed.
Seriously, we are building new bunks, to be ready before next summer. For this summer, camp will be divided into two divisions (sounds like a summer long color war, hmmm, that's an idea).
In other Nageela expansion news, NAGEELA MIDWEST has opened its doors in Indiana, and is spreading the Nageela spirit all over the country. You can check the out at www.campnageelamidwest.org.

Corn and Apples

WHY DID THE FIG TAKE THE PRUNE TO THE MOVIES?

CAUSE IT COULDNT FIND A DATE

Mazel Tov

I, I I, I I I would like to wish a huge mazel tov to our [former] camp driver,

Avi Appel

upon his marriage tonight to Rachel Gewirtz (sister of brother man, Avi Gewirtz and Devorah Locker).

Though we'll miss him in camp this summer, we're sure his spirit will live on in the van (next time ot breaks down, we'll know it's Avi).

It's not every day someone gets to become Tova's uncle.

Deep Thoughts

If a tree falls in the forest, do the other trees laugh at it?

Submitted by Jeffrey Weisz

A Little piece of Histroy

the origin of the Nageela zoo
Many people have asked me why Camp Nageela has a zoo. In fact on the Camp Nageela FAQ list, it's somewhere in the top one or two hundred. I was previously uncomfortable giving the true answer and just gave a typical answer like, "Scott likes animals," or "I don't know, go ask Rabbi Karmel." The truth is, Scott secretly hates animals, and Rabbi Karmel hasn't been in ccamp long enough to know the answer.

HERE IT IS:

In the ancient world before iPods were invented, Yehuda decided he needed a pet. He tried a few unsuccesful attempts at tarantulas, bats and water bugs, before he realized that animals didn't only fail to make him happy, but he had a terrible allergic reaction that resulted in... crying.

Most normal people would then try to make sure that there were no animals (barring the waiters) left in camp. Yehuda isn't most normal people. In fact he... well... we'll just leave it at that. There has been much speculation as to exactly how and why Yehuda personally brought the goats and other assorted mammals and fowl to camp, and quite a number of thoeries have appeared in scientific and psychological litterature.

This is a clipping from the Brittish Journal of Medicine:

The following is an excerpt from the Hawaain Journal of Contemporary Psychology:

Whatever the psychological or pathological evaluation of Yehuda may be, it is clear that the reason for his crying at the grand sing is not emotion, but a small hamster that he hides in his pocket.

Next time you visit the Nageela zoo... please try not to cry.

Butter- Pop Korn

Why was the archeologist depressed?

Because his career was in ruins!

Do you know what happened when the wheel was invented?

It caused a revolution!

I'm a Jew!

FINALLY!

After years and years. Pain and suffering by all of us who kept hearing from Yehuda about how the album is coming out, the album is coming outthe album is coming outthealbumiscomingoutthealbumiscomingout, you get the point. Well it's here!

Not only does Camp Nageela have our very own album, it doesn't get any better. The music, done by the Nochi Krohn band (a long time friend of Yehuda and me- they performed in camp a few years back). The singing is done by an awesome choir along with some stars of Jewish music, including Shlomo Schwed, a former NAGEELA counselor!

You'll hear some of your favorites:

I'm A Jew!

How can I know

Bumps and Curves

Narrow Bridge

Rushing, Cooking, and more!

You can order your copy today at www.imajew.org

Fun in the sun

As my stint out west comes to a close, I've been taking advantage of the incredible scenery that Nevada has to offer. Just to make you city boys jealous, I decided to post some pictures I took at the Valley of Fire State Park. On the right is a natural stone arch that would be perfect as a football throwing target in a "switch" night activity.

Next up, we have the new Camp Nageela van, a gorgeous red 1926 convertable Ford Model-T (we don't only have red mountains, we have red cars to go along with them). In the background is the other new camp van, a white 1933 plymouth. Guess what! I've just been informed that the camp vans will be even better- instead of 1926 models, they'll be 1986 models! And they will have air conditioning a few days a week, and a roof on most of it!

Good news and bad news. The good news is camp is building more bunks and rooms. The bad news is they won't be ready yet this year, so this is the temporary waiters' bunk. At least it's shady. Cleanup might be a bit rough, but the good news is it may be easier to get them up in the morning, and the lizards and rattlesnakes around make really, really fun pets.

Speaking of the western mountain ranges, there's a really strange natural phenomenon called "Nevada's blue mountains." Apparently, these bizarre rock formations spent millions of years under water, where they were subject to incresed exposure to sodium bifloctunase and barcodium2. These chemicals, along with the enormous water pressure combined to make a strange stone substance that appears from a distance to be bright blue in color, and similar in many of its charachteristics to plastic. This particular landmass, commonly known as Wigenhedge Rock, after famous explorer and backgamon player Fredrick Wigenhedge has the distinct appearance of a piece of playground equipment with Tova Locker's face in middle.

Anyway city slickers... don't feel too bad. All these sights are a little less cool when it's 100 degrees out.

Endless Possibilities

OK, so now it's time to hear from the peanut gallery... what do you all think of this as a t-shirt design? Everyone relates to it, and it even has some sort of meaningful message, not that I'm usually very concerned with that. There are almost endless twists and turns we can take, so feel free to offer your ideas.

Oh, and thanks to Shaya for the concept.

(by the way, I think the AMP design is out, unless I find out if it's kosher or not- i don't think it is)

DEEP THOUGHTS

What if there were no hypothetical questions?

Submitted by Jeffrey Weisz

Under two months, and counting...

Yessss
Only one month
and twenty eight days
until the
fabulous debut
of Nageela Boys 2007
GET PUMPED!

Big Rig video

Not quite as good as Avi Appel, but they'll do.

Korn Cheescake

Where does a T-Rex shop for groceries?

At the Dino-Store.

Why did the ant travel to Washington, DC?

He wanted to run for presid-ant.

Bring it

Here's a little song I wrote about the holiday of Shavuos (starting tonight):
To the tune of 'Just wrap it'

Sha-sha-sha-vuos, for thee I be yearnin'
Sha-sha-sha-vuos, all night I be learnin'

Three thousand years back, plus,
we was chillin out at Sinai,
G-d asked us to accept,
and we said a-ight; fine - I

will do and I will listen,
to the rules that you make
and then when we be done,
we gonna eat cheesecake

Sha-sha-sha-vuos
Sha-sha-sha-vuos

Yup you got it, tonight sis Shavuos, the holiday that we celebrate receiving the Torah (bible), our guidebook to life. It also happens to be the best selling book of all time (eat that J.K. Rowling!).

You're probably all asking, "Dani, what's your favorite thing about Shavuos?"
Well, maybe not all of you are asking that, just some of you...
OK, OK, so none of you care, I'm gonna tell you anyway, so just quiet down and listen!

When the Jewish people camped around Mt. Sinai to get the Torah, it says, "He camped beneath the mountain." Why does it say 'he', if it was a whole group of a few million people (some people say that the 'he' is referring to my imaginary friend Bartholomew, but it's a minority opinion)?

The answer is that the Jewish people at that time were such good friends- they had such unity (go unity, go unity, it's your birthday, etc.), that it was as if they were one person!

It's easy to love Jews who go to Camp Nageela, but the lesson we learn on Shavuos, is that in order for us to get on G-d's good side (and let's face it, that's about as good brownie points as you're gonna get), we gotta love every Jew, and treat them as if they were our own left pinky toe (pedicure, anyone?).

Also... note the title of this post, "Bring it."
On Shavuos people would bring offerings of the first fruit that grew in their fields, to thank G-d for giving them fruit (I always bring offerings of my first pickles). It's sorta like the original Thanksgiving. Appreciate the people who give us stuff.

So this Shavuos, don't forget to bring it!

DEEP THOUGHTS

I don't know about you, but I'm a bit confused why

my nose runs and my feet smell.

Submitted by Robert Kravets

Hooray! Yippee! Wow! Oh My!

Congrats to the Still Nuts Blog!

WE'VE REACHED 1,OOO HITS!

Alrighty people, let's get up to 10,000 before camp!

I can't believe it's not color war...

I mean it is color war... I mean, oh whatever. Can you imagine making an announcement and sending out flyers of exactly when and where color war is? That's crazy! Color war is supposed to be a surprise!
The surprise is that according to sources in the JEP office, we're expecting record high attendance- more kids than at any Shabbaton (except Camp, of course) in JEP's 20 year history! Eat that, Mr. Pickle head!
It's a bit sad, because this is the first time I'll be missing a color war shabbaton in quite a few years (like 7 or so). it's also pretty exciting, because it's the first Shabbaton being attended by a certain married man named Yehuda.

I can't wait to hear that Dorky lost!
Have a great Shabbos.

A little piece of history

the origin of the Nageela zoo

Many people have asked me why Camp Nageela has a zoo. In fact on the Camp Nageela FAQ list, it's somewhere in the top one or two hundred. I was previously uncomfortable giving the true answer and just gave a typical answer like, "Scott likes animals," or "I don't know, go ask Rabbi Karmel." The truth is, Scott secretly hates animals, and Rabbi Karmel hasn't been in ccamp long enough to know the answer.

HERE IT IS:

In the ancient world before iPods were invented, Yehuda decided he needed a pet. He tried a few unsuccesful attempts at tarantulas, bats and water bugs, before he realized that animals didn't only fail to make him happy, but he had a terrible allergic reaction that resulted in... crying.

Most normal people would then try to make sure that there were no animals (barring the waiters) left in camp. Yehuda isn't most normal people. In fact he... well... we'll just leave it at that. There has been much speculation as to exactly how and why Yehuda personally brought the goats and other assorted mammals and fowl to camp, and quite a number of thoeries have appeared in scientific and psychological litterature.

This is a clipping from the Brittish Journal of Medicine:

The following is an excerpt from the Hawaain Journal of Contemporary Psychology:

Whatever the psychological or pathological evaluation of Yehuda may be, it is clear that the reason for his crying at the grand sing is not emotion, but a small hamster that he hides in his pocket.

Next time you visit the Nageela zoo... please try not to cry.

Korn Bread

What time is it when you go to the dentist?

Tooth- Hurty!

Do everyone a favor! Send in YOUR jokes. That way they won't have to hear mine!

Nageela DVD

If you live in a normal part of the country (unlike me), you've probably received a DVD with some awesome video from Nageela '06 (courtesy of Mordy Shenker).

I'm really starting to get pumped! But before we move on to Nageela '07, let's spend a few monutes on that dvd.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PART?

Let's vote on it.

It's official

This summer, I'm making Dorky and Azi co-counselors.

Ego Trip

The following is an email I received about me from a staff member who will remain unnamed due to fear of perpetual shame on his part. It has been only slightly edited due to inappropriate language (see what kind of ppl like me?). It is completely real.

"Wow you're good. you effortlessly ,make life altering banners, pictures that people as a whole can rally behind and push forward into the oblivious oblivion. It's enough to make one brake out in song, but I will restrain myself and let a calm wash over me to allow myself to hear the world at large. Hark i can hear the mango's growing, life is grand."

Now obviously the reason I'm posting this is to give you guys (particularly Dorky) some ammunition to make fun of me with, since you don't seem to be able to find anything on your own.

Actually, I'm just really sick of Dorky and Azi bantering like a few llamas on caffeine (what exactly do llamas on caffeine do anyway?).

"I don't like the sweatshirt color."

"Well you're stupid."

"Is that the best line you could think of?"

"I am NOT anonymous"

"I still don't like the sweatshirt color."

You don't know how to spell."

"Well, you're still stupid."

and so on............... so go ahead, fire away! I might just 'fire' back!

Light 'em up

Jewish Calendar Flash:


Today is the holiday known as Lag BaOmer (meaning the 33rd day of the period between Passover and Shavuos).


Many people have trhe custom to light bonfires (of course, only with the propper supervision) in honor of the great light brought to the world with the writing of the great work on Kabbalah, known as the Zohar (the light) on this day.


Enjoy the holiday spirit!

more on Lag BaOmer

New Night Activity Director

Only a machine this talented could replace Yehuda

Just kidding. Yehuda will be back in Camp Nageela this summer. Warn your orthopedist!

Nageela Idol

Korn and Onions?

I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 bucks that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf.

And he said, 'no, the steaks are too high.'

Two robbers broke out in the bank, one of them pointing the gun to the cashier said, "Give me all your money, or you'll be GEOGRAPHY!" The cashier laughed and said, "You mean to say 'HISTORY.'" The robber answered, "Don't change the subject."